Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
