Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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