Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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