I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
