If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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