Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
We need to get me chipped asap
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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