i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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