woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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