So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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