He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
