Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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