Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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