at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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