Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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