what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
