i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
