i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
