My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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