you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize