This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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