i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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