She's JV to your varsity
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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