You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize