So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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