come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
