I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
