so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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