i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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