# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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