I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
