Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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