I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
