Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize