This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
