i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
