Jerry, you need to find god
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
