i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
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