halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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