By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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