You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
