butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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