I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
