But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
