It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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