Me too!
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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