he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize