I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
