Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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