See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
