Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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