Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
You work out of a Hotel?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
