I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
