Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
